Archive for July, 2010

Fiction I’ll Believe

Monday, July 5th, 2010

Fiction I’ll Believe. I think I’m addicted to first times. I’m not talking about something remarkable like the first time running a 25k marathon or first time walking in space. I’m talking about the first time trying something that people do all the time or first did a long time ago. For example over the past five years I’ve experienced my first time drinking coffee. First time taking drugs. First time smoking pot. First time passing out drunk. First time waking up not knowing where I am.¬†First time breaking up. First time asking someone out. First time dating. First time saying sorry. First time being unhappy. First time… well you get the idea. I wonder, though, will I run of out these first times? ¬†What then?

This is the first time I’ve ever written a song quite like this.

I’m staring at this empty coffee cup
as you’re breaking what took years to build up
you’re speaking future present past
each word stings more than the last

I’m holding on so hard that it’s going to crack
telling me things I wish you’d take back
Sorting through the years takes only hours
What is mine, what is yours now there’s no ours

there’s no trace of hope left in your face
if the heart is home then just what is this place
please don’t leave oh stay and lie to me
cause when truth hurts it’s fiction I’ll believe

sleeping on your side of the bed
a stranger where you should be instead
and it’s killing me as my heart begins to rot
but it’s filling the empty space where you’re not

I can’t sleep because then I will dream
of when I woke you will be beside me
why did you leave oh come back and lie to me
cause when truth hurts it’s fiction I’ll believe